May is the Cruelest month

Holding out hope for the predicted high of 80 degrees (later revised to 70, but as of 7:30 pm it only reached a high of 56 degrees), I wavered through the day reading various books while looking out the window. I spent the entire day holding out for weather warm enough and dry enough to paint outside. At least I wasn’t playing soccer on slippery fields with a strong northerly wind and intermittent drizzle.

Such hope and promise heard during Friday’s weather forecasts were once again to be dashed by the grayness of a typical Memorial holiday weekend. I should be remembering those who served and sacrificed for our country and me, but instead I wallow in the memory of previous years’ “start of summer” celebrations. Too cold and too damp. I try to resign myself to the fact that this is the perfect opportunity to sit inside, curl up close to the fireplace and read a book. A scenario I long for on most days. But as I sit and read, the call of things that need to get done is ever present.

Besides, being home all day does provide me with special opportunities like going ‘a round’ with the wife. It’s a lot harder to do battle when I’m not on the premises. But today I was home; and I was given the chance following an episode where one of our kids challenged the Swansmith (a.k.a. the Warden) with an editorial from the school newspaper. The Swanmeister was able to go the first few rounds herself, but as is her practice, she calls me in to defend her and do a little tag team. Reluctantly, I put in my two cents worth. But I speak too slowly and employ a different means of attack. The Swansmith needs to step back in to get the point across. The kids loose interest and are off to another activity of X-box or Frisbee or banging on the drums.

So now it’s up to us to tangle. (DISCLAIMER: you will probably get her side of the story on Swansmith.) Why don’t you defend me, she asks. I do but in a different way, I respond. Thus begins a well-trod path to “how do we get through to the kids?” The Warden prefers the more direct approach. Her chief concern is that they know what she believes and what she is thinking. Whereas I have told her often that people can seldom be persuaded until they are ready to accept what you have to say. My thinking, in short, is that it’s just as important to work on a person’s will as on their reason when discussing things controversial. Then, as an example of the fact that I don’t always practice what I preach, I told her very directly that her way was not very effective. She heard me say that her way was completely pointless and non-productive.

This gave us a chance to have a true heart-to-heart in the dungeon from whence I now write. With the lights off and only the monitor screen to lighten the room, I had a chance to apologize for the way I speak directly to her while at the same time counseling her not to speak so directly to our children. We probably should have been out in the cold rain watching the Easterners kick around a soccer ball for a 1-1 tie.